Who That Prayer was Really For

Sometimes... in a house with ALOT of estrogen... Chris and I find ourselves going from one emotional conversation to the next.  Right when one daughter seems to be coming out of something that was tough, the next one is hot on her tails.  This week has been no different... in fact it's what I would call an "overlap week".  In other words... no breaks in between emotional crisis.
Something we are finding out as well is that these talks are usually needed somewhere around 10 and 11pm; right when Daddy is thinking about his 5am alarm clock.  So tonight at precisely 10:37 the need arose and my wonderful hubby was once again up to the task.  (i'll tell you one thing... it takes a special man to be there for 4 females... just sayin)
One of the girls was once again at a low point over our move here to Chico and her difficulty in feeling at home here.  They all want to make friends so badly and the amount of time it takes to do it is not always easy.  Chris began talking to her about God's plan for her and the fact that we don't always see in the here and now why things happen... like moving to Chico.  He told her that God loves her soooo much and has her best interest at heart.  I then chimed in with "Do you believe that?  Do you believe God wants the very best for you?"  Wait!  who am I talking to here?  My daughter? or was that God asking ME that question?  It was one of those moments when we say what needs to be said... we speak the truth, but inside we are struggling with the exact same thing.  Do you believe it Laura?  I believe it for my daughter... but why is it hard to believe for myself?  I think this is a trust issue for me... I don't completely trust God's heart towards me... heck... lately I have been struggling with that old feeling that seems I will struggle with for the rest of my life... Does He even see me?
I know he does... He promises it over and over.
As Chris began to pray out loud for her at the end of our conversation, the prayer seemed to be for me in that moment.  "Help her to feel your presence... Help her to know you care even about the small stuff.... Help her to trust you with everything."  Great huh?  Here Chris was praying for my daughter and I kept putting my name in there... you know what though?  I think it's okay... no, I know it's okay.  That prayer was just as much for me tonight.  The words I spoke to her were meant for me as well.  Do I trust in God's heart for me?  After tonight I'm thinking... absolutely!